Apologize
by Kitte-Wolf
Summary: He gave up everything for her... Even his life. T for suicide. Ex-Chalant, anit-Chalant, whatever the term is.


**Okay, just a little bit of a fic I wrote because I wanted to try my hand at a songfic. I don't own Young Justice or Apologize. If I did own Young Justice, Chalant wouldn't be canon because Chalant is all flirting and make-outs. Execute has more depth to it.**

I step back, feeling like I had been punched in the gut. I stare with wide eyes at the couple, who are clinging to each other with passion burning bright, bright enough that it lit up all past blind spots, all past shortcomings and excuses. Turning away from them, I bow my head before slipping away, back to the Cave, refusing to let the tears fall.

For there in that alley, right behind the cinemas, was my girlfriend Zatanna and some blonde sucking face. I could even hear their moans.

_I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground_

_**Recognized: Robin B01**_

I walk into the living room/kitchen, plastering a smile on my face, glad for the shades covering my eyes- eyes colored heartbreak blue.

I had once shown her those eyes. I thought that I had messed up, by not showing her them. Now I really know that I messed up by showing them to her.

Who knew what that back-stabbing cheating bitch would do with my identity now.

"Hey man!" Wally greets me, I just grin at him and then stiffen as a certain designation rings through the Cave.

_**Recognized: Zatanna B08**_

I turn to face her smiling, lying face as she walks into the room, quite obviously on cloud nine. She was nearly glowing. For now, seeing my fake smile, she thought she had gotten away with it one more night. Then I drop the façade.

"When were you going to tell me you were seeing someone else?"

"Robin, I don't know what you saw, but it's not what you think!" Her eyes are desperate now, desperation sky blue. I'm just stunned. Is this really happening? I thought she would at least have the honor to admit it. Wally and the rest of the Team just stare, jaws dropped and eyes wide.

_And I'm hearing what you say, but I just can't make a sound_

"It wasn't what it looked like," Zatanna tried to justify herself again. "Robin, I need you! You're truly the only one for me, I promise, I swear! I'll even give you my word if you need!"

I just shake my head, closing my eyes as she slowly stepped forward, arms raising to pull me into a hug.

_You tell me that you need me, then you go and cut me down- but wait!_

"Robin, I'm sorry if you think that I'm cheating on you, but I'm not!"

I turn more away from her, holding up my right arm to keep her at a distance. I know what I saw, I know what I've been seeing. I've just been blinded by my delusions and her angelic countenance that I hadn't been able to see what was really happening.

She does need me, but for a different reason than what she was implying.

She needs me to control. She thrives off of being in control. She just needs control, she can't live without it. That's why she was so distraught when Fate possessed Zatara. She couldn't control him.

It must have been living Hell inside that helmet for her.

_You tell me that you're sorry, didn't think I'd turn around and say…_

I watch the Team's further reactions. Conner's just dumbstruck, M'gann's hands are over her mouth with her eyes wide, Artemis looks confused, Wally just looks unsurprised. Raquel just frowns, the look on her face says she believes Zatanna. Kaldur is just shaking his head.

I turn back around to full face Zatanna.

"No."

That was all I said.

_It's too late to apologize_

"What?" She looks upset, putting up another façade, feigning heartbreak and looking thrown.

"It's too late. I know exactly what I saw," I reply simply.

"Look, what do you think you saw? Because I can promise you, that it's not what it looked like!" She's getting more desperate.

"You've been cheating on me," my voice is flat, almost emotionless.

"I'm sorry, but-"

"No! No you're not. Zatanna, it's too late for you to apologize."

_It's too late!_

"What? Robin, I… Please, Robin, let me explain!" Her eyes are wide, begging, as the Team just watches.

"No. I don't want to hear any of your excuses, your lies, or your empty promises," my glare is back in full force. The punched-gut feeling still lingered.

"I'm sorry! If you'd just let me explain-!"

"No, I know I saw you sucking face with that one blonde. Zatanna, it's too late."

_I said it's too late to apologize_

"Robin! Just listen to me! Just listen to what you're implying!"

I know what I'm stating. There's no implying about it-"

"Just let me explain!" She's glaring now, upset over the fact that she's losing me. The fact that she's losing her toy.

"I am not listening to another lie you say. Zatanna, it's over. You don't get to use me any. More." I turn, stalking out of the room, down the hall, and into mine.

_It's too late, too late, oh, oh_

I slam the door before collapsing on the bed, burying my head in the crook of my arms and breaking down. I sob for a good ten minutes until all of my tears are gone. I'm guaranteed privacy, with Batman and the League off-world. I uncurl myself, sitting up straight on the edge of the bed before walking over to the dresser I keep my birdarangs. Pulling off my shirt, I look at my bare torso in the mirror above the dresser, seeing a long scar across the right side.

_I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you, oh, oh_

I remember exactly how I got it. It had been a normal mission. Gather info, take down baddies, hightail it.

Until the Joker showed up.

He managed to get all of my teammates tied up in a corner, and it was just me standing.

He saw the look Zatanna and I had exchanged.

And then he asked me what I'd do for the girl I loved.

He held that God-forsaken knife to her throat, guffawing in glee when I offered myself up for her.

When Batman showed up, the Joker was standing over me, knife held in his hand and covered in my blood.

_I need you like a heart needs a beat, but it's nothing new, yeah!_

I shake my head, pulling myself out of my reverie. Zatanna knew almost everything about me. She calmed me down when I was in a rage. She could cheer me up when I was feeling depressed.

I had so stupidly, idiotically centered my life around her. I had spent less and less time with Wally and Roy, even if the latter were always busy trying to find his base DNA-donor.

I grew more distant from Batman.

I spent less time with Barbara and my Gotham Academy friends.

She became my everything.

I'm so stupid!

_I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue, and you say…_

I really had loved her. She was so perfect…

Until I saw the truth.

She had never really loved me. Never. She was just using me, and now anything I'd felt for her died down to ashes…

Everything in my life is ash now. She burned my like the liar she is, and I didn't notice the all-consuming flames of being a tool until it was too late.

I really was just her tool.

_Sorry, like an angel Heaven let me think was you, but I'm afraid…_

A knock on the door came.

"Robin, please, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! It was an accident!"

I cringe, more tears falling, and I grab a birdarang and make my escape via air vent. I somehow end up on top of the mountain, once again crying my eyes out, birdarang gripped so tightly it cut into my hand. It was painful.

And suddenly, the pain of the heartbreak, of her betrayal, lessened.

The physical lessened the mental.

_It's too late to apologize._

Still shirtless, I made a small cut with the birdarang on my forearm.

Her betrayal hurt less.

I made another cut.

Her lies meant less to me.

Another cut, and I no longer felt so upset.

But I was still so stupid, such an idiot…

Almost absentmindedly, I carved a word into my arm.

**Gullible.**

_It's too late_

I carved another word into my arm. By now, my hands were covered in my own blood. I carved more.

**Idiot.**

**Tool.**

**Worthless.**

**Toy.**

They all describe me, I am those words.

If you looked up the definition of tool in the dictionary, you'd see a picture of me.

_I said it's too late to apologize_

I startled gasp comes from behind me. I turn around, not realizing my glasses had fallen off. It's Artemis, her eyes are wide. She rushes forward, grabbing the birdarang out of my hands. My vision is already going blurry. The cuts on my wrists are bleeding, and by now my blood covers the rock I sat down on earlier.

_It's too late, whoa!_

She grabs my face, turning my head so that I'm looking into her eyes… which are filled with tears. I can hear her yelling something, something I can't make out. I'm beginning to go under…

Wally shows up, his green eyes widen when he sees me covered in my own blood with my own blood-covered birdarang and my own self-inflicted wounds.

Then everything goes black.

_It's too late to apologize_

I don't regret it. I had nothing left. But I am sorry, sorry that they had to be there.

_It's too late_

I guess that if there had been a next time, I wouldn't have made the same mistakes.

_I said it's too late to apologize_

I bet she cried.

_It's too late_

Fuck that, I know she cried. Just like everyone else, but not for the same reason.

_I said it's too late to apologize, yeah_

She was sad she got caught.

_I said it's too late to apologize, yeah_

I bet she said sorry at her funeral again.

It really is too late to apologize- for her, for me, for the world.

Because apologies are empty lies. The real forgiveness comes from telling someone exactly how you screwed up, exactly what you did.

It comes from telling the truth.

I hope they bury me on my stomach so that lying, cheating bitch has to kiss my ass.

Bruce cried real tears for me, he'll really miss me…

God, Bruce, I'm an idiot for leaving you…

I really am sorry, Bruce, I'm sorry you had to be there when I flatlined, but I just don't want to face her anymore…

_I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground…_


End file.
